Dad forces 21-year-old daughter to pay $1600 in rent, despite only charging her sister $400: 'I have the smallest room in the house.'

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    Woman with curly hair resting chin on her hand
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    Am I the bad guy for for not wanting to pay my dad $1600 in rent a month?

    for context, i am a 21yo college student who just got a job. the minute i got my job, my dad decided its time for me to start paying rent. (fair enough i suppose)
  • 03
    don't get me wrong, i'm totally okay with paying rent, but $1600??? not to mention, i also have a sister, and she also pays rent (only $400 though). it just feels like an absurd amount of money to take from your kids.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 04
    most rentals in my area are around that same cost, if not less.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 05
    i don't wanna sound greedy, but i am definitely annoyed by the random rent i'm expected to pay. i don't know anyone else my age who has to pay their parents rent to this extent. not to mention, i am constantly helping my
    via u/baldcatuser
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    dad with work around the house and whatever projects he is doing. to add fuel to the fire, we already don't have a great relationship. he prevents me from going out at any given opportunity, and i
    via u/baldcatuser
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    can't have friends over because the entire house is covered with cameras (which are incredibly uncomfortable for most guests). at this point, it's like i'm paying nearly $2K to live in a place i hate.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 08
    ami the a hle for not wanting to give my dad THAT much? EDIT: some additional context i feel i should mention:
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 09
    - the difference in rent between me and my sister is because it's on a "percentage basis" according to our pay. i make more money than my sister, so i pay more.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 10
    - a significant amount of people are saying this is my dad's way of kicking me out, but i genuinely think it's the opposite. he knows i want to save up to buy a property of my own, and i think this is his way of holding me back.
    via u/baldcatuser
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    he talks all the time about how be "wants to buy a big property for the entire family to live on." i think he doesn't like to be alone, and i think he likes having control over other people, and this is his way of keeping me glued
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 12
    here. very strange dynamic. - a few people told me to grow a spine and move out, and trust me i am TRYING! it's a bit difficult with my job and schooling to focus on.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 13
    Blazed 187 If it cost the same to rent locally move out and rent your own place
    via u/Blazed187
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    Wicked Winked If you're paying full market rate you might as well get actual tenant rights, privacy and no cameras watching your every move.
    via u/WickedWinked
  • 15
    Dangerous-Bend-4153 And OP can claim themselves on taxes.
    via u/Dangerous-Bend-4153
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    Saint_of_Grey This is the biggest aspect of paying parents rent. The parents need to report that as income, because the payer will be reporting that as an expense on their taxes (and any other federal benefit forms).
    via u/Saint_of_Grey
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    Impressive Moment786 NTA-if you can afford to pay him $1600 a month in rent you would be better off to just go get your own place.
    via u/Impressive_Moment786
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    baldcatuser OP you're totally right and i considered that, but doing so would cause so much conflict in my family, they're a bit dramatic when it comes to things like that. realistically i shouldn't care though.
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 19
    onenotalreadytaken You come from a family then that thrives on conflict. You will have conflict if you move out. You will have conflict if you stay and pay. But if you move out, you will have a shot at independence and peace. It will also give you a chance to clear your head and unpack this toxic dynamic you were raised in.
    via u/onenotalreadytaken
  • 20
    Impressive Moment786 If your dad is willing to charge you $1600 in rent while you are in college he doesn't really seem to care about your financial wellbeing, so in return don't care about his opinion. You need to do what is best for you.
    via u/Impressive_Moment786
  • 21
    Elven-nature People don't pay rent based on what they earn. They pay the same for similar amenities. So if your sister pays 400, you should pay the same unless there is a good reason, e.g. you have a much larger room, en-suite bathroom, etc.
    via u/Elven-nature
  • 22
    baldcatuser OP i have the smallest room in the house, ironically enough
    via u/baldcatuser
  • 23
    HooverMaster Thats not ironic. It tracks with everything you've said so far.
    via u/HooverMaster
  • 24
    ConflictGullible392 NTA. I live in one of the most expensive cities in the country and you can get a room for less than that. Move out.
    via u/ConflictGullible392
  • 25
    kykiwibear 1600 is more than i paid for rent for 2 bedroom in New jersey.
    via u/kykiwibear

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